So that was 10 minutes of my life I’ll never get back.
I’m talking, of course, about the agonizing 600 seconds I spent struggling to watch “Speed Kills,” the recently released Hollywood bio-pic based loosely—and I mean pile-of-string-loose—on the life and times of high-performance marine industry legend Don Aronow, the man behind the famed Cigarette, Donzi and Magnum brands.
Another go-fast boating movie disappoints for the same reasons they always do.
Assassinated in 1987, Aronow, played by a goofy, hammy and downright silly John Travolta (and I’m a fan)—at least in the 10 minutes of the movie I was able to sit through in the comfort of my own home thanks to Comcast Xfinity—became the stuff of good and bad legend before he hit the pavement. His legacy and alleged involvement with organized crime figures and smugglers is still hotly debated in the go-fast powerboating world. Even today, Aronow remains larger than life.
And yet I knew the movie would be a train wreck long before I gave it a 10-minute chance. Movies that revolve around the high-performance powerboating world, or use it as a prominent feature plot element, are doomed to fail.